YouTuber Describes Perfectly How It Is Dealing With Siblings!

AJ Akoko series

    We love our siblings to death, well more or less. Without them our childhood wouldn’t be as fun as it was. Having someone to talk to, play with and even fight is an unforgettable part of our memories. One day we’ll look back to all of those old days and feel nostalgia about our childhood.

    A sibling relationship is likely to be the most enduring of our lives. The impact they have on our young and adult lives is enormous – they shape our history and our character, to a far greater extent than is usually acknowledged. The book Siblings In Development, edited by psychotherapists Vivienne Lewin and Belinda Sharp, states ‘siblings are not just second editions in relation to the parents, but have a profound importance in their own right. Relationships with siblings are ineradicably fixed in our psyches.’

    A study tracking almost 300 men from the late 1930s to the present day has shed new light on the importance of the sibling bond. According to the Harvard Study of Adult Development, 93 per cent of the men who were thriving at 65 had been close to a sibling in their early life. The study also reports that poorer relationships with siblings before the age of 20 could be a predictor of depression later in life, suggesting that the longer we can sustain close sibling relationships in adulthood, the more it can benefit and protect us emotionally.

    Classic sibling dynamics often depend on what position we hold in the family. Elder children can often feel usurped when a younger one comes along and these feelings of rivalry can last well into adulthood. Many studies show that sisters tend to be closer to one another and that the worst age for bickering – regardless of gender – is when the elder child is 13 and the second-born is 10 years old. These dynamics are further complicated if stepsiblings are involved.

    ‘Constant competition may well shape our life script, leading us to filter every subsequent human interaction through the distorting prism of our original relationship with our siblings,’ says Lloyd-Elliott. ‘We’re all immersed in the unique culture of our particular home situation. Inevitably, any siblings who share that environment with us have an enormous influence on our overall experience of the world and we carry this forwards, often unconsciously, into our adult lives.’

    In childhood it is often easier to express those negative feelings, but as we grow older, we try to suppress unpleasant feelings such as envy and anger. This is why so many siblings drift apart. ‘I was close to my brother as a young girl, but when I was nine I was sent to boarding school while he went to a day school,’ says Karen, 38. ‘I was so jealous of the fact that he stayed at home, but I also felt guilty and found it easier to keep my distance rather than admit this to him. It’s only now we’ve both got children that I feel able to see more of him.’ Meanwhile her brother remains unaware of his sister’s intense feelings.

    Having siblings is a good thing. Well, not always. Especially when you’re doing something important and your younger sibling always ruins your plans… we’ve all been there. There’s new YouTuber called AJ Akoko who has been a YouTube sensation so far. He has managed to get around 7k subscribers within a month and thousands of views. In his video: “OLDER VS YOUNGER SIBLING” he describes perfectly hwo it is do deal with a younger sibling. We invite you to watch it yourself.

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